Lets talk about this shall we?
I'm not really a smart person, I ain't Stephen Hawking too. I wished I was Einstein, but I rather be myself.( Dude, can u imagine me, looking like him, seriously...!!)
Karma according to Wiki-
A religious concept that adapt in general and holistic human life irregardless of their religion origins
Karma (Sanskrit: कर्म About this sound kárma (help·info), kárman- "act, action, performance; Pali: kamma) in Indian religions is the concept of "action" or "deed", understood as that which causes the entire cycle of cause and effect (i.e., the cycle called saṃsāra) originating in ancient India and treated in Hindu, Jain, Sikh and Buddhist philosophies.
'Karma' is an Eastern religious concept in contradistinction to 'faith' espoused by Abrahamic religions (Judaism, Christianity, and Islam), which view all human dramas as the will of God as opposed to present - and past - life actions. In theistic schools of Hinduism, humans have free will to choose good or evil and suffer the consequences, which require the will of God to implement karma's consequences, unlike Buddhism or Jainism which do not accord any role to a supreme God or gods. In Eastern beliefs, the karmic effects of all deeds are viewed as actively shaping past, present, and future experiences. The results or 'fruits' of actions are called karma-phala-
But somehow, no one can really explains how Karma works.
In a dumb blonde way of explaining the above statement- u do bad things, bad things will come back and hunt you, or some would say 'bite you back in the ass!kinky huh? :)
Now, many people make daily decisions and their action that they made , will end in a results of a by product of life. We're naturally instruct by many factors- guts, inner voices, life experience-that blink factor, emotions and very rare we would use our brain to analyze and evaluate before we deciding to take any actions or decisions. But how many of us do that? That's why,as that results would be- so many things happens around us- wars,businesses going down the drain, marriage problems , relationship issues, friends become enemies. All this end up piling in their own category- good or evil. But the two are very much subjective, some can view good as evil, some view evil as good. It's all goes back the real intention.
I am not a rare exceptional on this matter. I've done many things, that turns to be good and evil. It has a balance of it owns. I'm guilty of not admitting my mistakes, making the same mistakes is like a rush to me. Drawn to my own SHITS, desperate and pathetic. Assuming my good deeds will be rewarded -karma- but turns out to be an evil plot that I disguise it with my 'good' deeds. I'm not trying to put myself down and be bitter about this, but it's a reminder for myself, is never too late to change and be a better person I am and I was. I was blinded and intoxicated by those fake and imaginative feelings of mine. Diluted by MY OWN dreams, fantasies fairy tales. I was pre-assuming that if I do it, if I hope & wished hard for it, I'll get what I want. You can never always get what you want, you have to accept that you can only gets what you need.
Somehow, all these has resulting me doing all the stupid and ignorant things, I'm very much aware of the bad & evil things that I've done. But my ego self only realize them , bit by bit(it's amazing how a total time with yourself will open your heart so wide that all has accessible within your reach.
As we're going through our daily life,it's quite a must for us to encounter those heartbreak moments, happiness & sadness, drama & tragedy -But always always forget the only thing that remains in us - love- is not wrong to admit you have love in you, is not wrong to love people around u, is definitely not wrong to be loved . But, the amount of our self understanding on love is differ and vary from each individual. As karma goes, if you love & u will get love too?! Or the other way around.
People around me and myself always warned me of Karma. Try not to make mistakes, try not to do bad things. You'll suffer when Karma comes and knocking on your door. But why should we be afraid of the things that you've done before,you have to accept it and moved on.
No matter what, we are naturally drawn to make mistakes, doing those evil and bad things to yourself or to people around you. It's matter of doing it out of spike , out of frustration, out of anger, out of depressions, out of guilt or any(some happens when you don't even realize it, until the chain of reactions appears in front of you)- and somehow u have the power to control the impact and effect. I've done it all, and I must confess- These has made me a better person, I admit my wrongs. I'll do something to fix it. Even now I'm making an effort to do it in person, I make a point to apologize sincerely and profusely. But I'm ready to accept any consequences, I try not to make the same mistakes again. I tell my heart that don't be afraid of making any more mistakes or being despair about them- There's always ways to fix things- For God creates problems,issues and drama for us human to find solutions that hide beneath them all.
Is no more a reason for me to be bitter and all caught up in that negativity eternally . I have the power to change ME. And I DO...I will and I can :)
I'm ready for Karma to happen to me anytime -sooner or later. But for the meantime, I don't want to be that bitter person I used to be. I don't want to be that person who hates herself so much that she actually destroying her life bit by bit. I'm going to stop wishing and praying evil/bad things to happen to those people who breaks my heart, people who plays with my emotion & feelings - I will wish them only the best life, pray them with all the blessings. If u do pray for my happiness and I'll do it twice more. I'm going to forgive myself & tell myself I've done my best and I can do it even more better.
I shall forgive the people who had hurt me before and I pray for their happiness from now on -
This including these People- Jacob Shaun- I forgive you, and I apologize on all the wrong doings that I've put upon you before. I've to confess, what I've done is the worst thing that a friend could do to. We have many fond memories together as a friend. I sincerely hope for the best for you & pray for your happiness and success. I'm not expecting you to forgive me immediately, is your choice. I respect that. But let me tell you how much u meant to me, you were there through my ups & downs, you truly cared & loved me as your friend before. I really appreciate that. I hope you realize that someday and moved on and pass this phase. I do hope someday, instead of the awkward silents, the obvious avoidance - replaced by a smile and simple 'hello'
To Gary Francis- Whatever happened before, when I assumed you're the total BITCH and the reasons behind of some of my life drama & tragedy- I know u meant well, you're looking after your friend. I truly appreciate that. Thank you and I'm sorry for what I've done to you. Friends cha?!
To Mohamad Farhan Darin, I'm sorry for making you the rebound case of mine, making you the victim of my pathetic and sad attempts. I'm sorry for what I've wrote about you, you're nothing like what I wrote, and you're a total opposite of all the things I wrote about you. You're an amazing friend and I see a bright and fantastic future ahead of you. I adore our friendship and I do not wish to lose any more friends in my life. You made me a better person, a happier person, a person who still believes in all the love in the world again.
Thank you for your kindness and thank you for being there when I needed you the most..
To Shamsul Bahrain
You're my 1st love, and you're the reason why I almost break out, I was torn you left me and I was suicidal. You gave me love, and you gave me pain. But I forgive you. I'm sorry for what ever I've done to you. I pray for your happiness in love, and life.
To Jimmy Aszikie
The love of my life, the promised we made before, the time that we spent, the love that you gave & the heart break & despairs that u bring- U've done your best and I'm forgiving you. It was never meant to be, and I pray for your happiness and much love for you and your family. I hope only the best for you. Thank you
To all my friends that I've done wrong too, please accept my sincere apologies.
I'm not scared of Karma, but I do scare of Allah.
Is never too late to be a good person, to be forgiving , to be kind , to be generous and to be sincere ...
xoxo
No comments:
Post a Comment