Saturday, November 24, 2012

November is waving goodbye soon

Hey there beautiful people. It's been almost a week since my last post. Was occupied with work, courses, reports , reports and conducting briefing. Yup, that's pretty much sum up my work life. On the positive note, I'm finalizing the land and property ownership , pretty much like inheriting it from my dad. So, this could help to make the total rebuilding of our new house dream closer. I hope everything will run smoothly. Inshallah. So what else is happening to me the last couple of days, plenty I must say. But I'm still surviving. The Breaking Dawn (Twilight Saga ) opened last thursday, was quite tempted to watch the premier, but due to work . I totally forgot about it. Since I promised my sister and her two daughters to watch it this year together, I've firmly decided to watch it next week. Planning a trip to Miri, probably my last trip for this year. I'm going to have a pretty packed 6 weeks , just a perfect closure to 2012. Distracting myself from the fact that my life is quite consumed by work & family this year. Others are eagerly waiting for the year end long holidays. I might be sitting in my cubic playing some very much overly altered and auto-tuned Glee versions of Christmas songs. In a few days, December will come. Yikes! How does this happens so fast? Anyway..will rant more. Am cooking a chicken porridge for dinner tonight , yumm xx Smile and Happy mode activated .

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Disney's & Barney's NY

Combining two of my favorite thing: Disney's and Fashion. Too cute !

Laid back sunday

Hi peeps, wishing everyone a happy sunday . It's indeed a laidback sunday. Can't really sleep lately, I wished I know why. Could it be because of my trouble tummy , could it be because of weird sleeping pattern the last few weeks. I must change it before it's getting worst. So I decided to try and wake up earlier tomorrow. Since it's monday. So wished me luck guys. Enjoy the rest of the sunday

Friday, November 16, 2012

Weekend is here: The Drama epilogue

Saturday 17th November 2012, my plan to sleep in and wake up in the afternoon fail big time. Interrupted by the sudden power trip and since I was left with Bapak at home(mom and kakak went to my brother's place last night for a weekend gateway )Bapak being himself start being dramatic , asking me to inspect the whole house for the cause of the trip. There I was at exactly 7 in the morning, with a slightly heavy headed due to my last night blogging extravaganza (which I slept at around 3am). After an hour playing detective, I found the cause. The power point for the TV access in the living room was the actual reason. So we decided not to use the power point till my brother the electrician and the network expert to check and revert the issues. No need explain to further, the electric back to normal. This house need an extreme overhaul, something that in the pipeline. Major rebuilding, it's been 28 years. A new change is in a tall order for this house. Something I pray almost everyday that Allah will give me the ease and access to fulfill this dream of mine. A bucket list of mine. A hope to give bapak and mak a taste in ease and maybe experience luxury. Meanwhile, bapak left me all alone at home while he then follow suits to join mak and kakak for a short road trip to my sister's in law parents house somewhere at a not so remote rural of Kota Samarahan. I decided to make use of the early morning to do some house cleaning, doing dishes, doing laundry and since I'm hungry. I've cooked myself a brunch (just noodle soup), since my Iphone keep on beeping since 9am , alerting me with work emails (Oh I hate working and receiving emails in the weekend) I did what I have to do: WORKING. After Dzuhur solah, I now have the time on my own. So I decided to update my blog for today. Actually, while watching Food network Asia in HD. I don't really get the idea of the HD part, because it doesn't make any different. Probably I've been spoiled by HD TV for the last 3 years. My eyes couldn't make a different anymore. Signs of ageing? Ekkk!! I am quite tempted to rant about what happened to me a few months back that makes me a different person now ,and how now I do have a new perception and understanding of friendships and enemies. Here you go... Almost a year ago, I was introduced to a colleague from HQ KL, a big "fat" LGBT (I swear I was trying to describe him or whom now I prefer to call it 'it" in a more loving way possible) but yeah, a blind dog can sniff him from miles away on how campy gay 'it' is. Anyway, a friend once told me. LGBTs when they meet for the 1st time, it's either end up as friends or sworn enemies and some lovers (ok, color me lesbian!)Being myself which I blamed solely on to me, I'm not judgmental(at least not to my own kind) so 'it' and I become friends (1st, for the record you can yada yada yada...about the stereotype rules of colleagues becomes friends shits to me later...) For a year I was a devoted friend to 'it' and I have nothing but love and respect to 'it'. 'It' introduced me to life beyond work, social responsibility and corporate affairs(that was I thought at first too) and I learned so much . So as a friend to 'it' and being myself the drama queen that no one can deny. Being myself,I am not afraid to speak my mind. I was loud, comical and sexual. I don't hide my personality and I don't pretend to be holy and righteous. I am and always be a dirty foul mouthed bitch that everyone's loves or hates . That IS me. Then,I started to share my problems with 'it'(mostly relationships issues with my now boyfriend, ok this will be updated in the next blog. Yes I'm not single, and yes like any other long distant relationship. It's fucking TOUGH. I'll rant on these soon. I promise xx) I can't remember whether I was a bit over the top when I'm sharing these with 'it' and on my defends. I was the drama queen, and of course is all about me (bad Neyna!) We have some mutual friends and one of them was this another 'it' (we're basically rivals since the day we first met , because of our similar interest on chubby boys) and they're like best friends. I mean seriously like those mean teen drama girls groupies you either hate or love . To add some sugar to the spice. They've been talking shits about ME , I mean MAJOR shits about me and here's the drill. They would be 'sharing' these with my boyfriend and check this out. On DAILY fucking basis. How pathetic is that. They even have a special 'Whatsapp Group " dedicated to diss me on daily basis, their legion of members increased and those innocent bystanders that don't know me in person would eventually have this idea of how diluted I am. I was called very descriptive names, a whore ,cheap sluts, ugly overweight ladyboy . I was called delusional of the grander on my self obsessions of labels (so what???) for a year, the 'it' and their gang doing this and my boyfriend will be the one their targeting . Probably because they want us to be separated and mind the other chubby chaser 'it' that I told you earlier obviously attracted to my cute adorable chubby manly boyfie of mine . But alas, maybe he loves me so much that he can't stand the bitchy shits these 'it' beings and maybe he was fed-up to see how blinded I was being stabbed repetitiously behind my back. He spill it . Yes , he DID. We literally fight as I was a bit stubborn and refused to believe all these till he shows all the valid facts and proofs that in fact these shits are all TRUE. I was absolutely bummed and I was disappointed with how childish it was. I wasn't angry or mad by 'it'. I am sadden by these. The 'it's are having some early mid life crisis, taking it on me was immature and pathetic attempt of the.I REFUSED to be the victim here. I am not going to look back and regret, it happened for a reason I know. It was days before Ramadhan. I decided to get answers from the supreme power and the holy month was a blessing indeed . Every day without fail, I pray and Dzikir recites whenever I can. All I want was peace and answers. I actually found the answers that lies within me. I do not need to justify who I am and who I was, the damaged done. Hearts broken to pieces but I decided to heal it on my own, not even my boyfriend can help. I need to help myself to get on my feet. I am now more careful and I must say it was a great lessons. What ever it is. I know myself better, my family knows me better and my real friends knows me so much better. I DO NOT
need this in my life any more. Ultimately, I'll let these 'it' goes away. Even one day I may encounter them again, I'll walk taller and stronger and slightly ignore and strike a pose. Let them continuously hates , that's the price of being a Queen bitch. If years ago Madonna was weak , she will never be where she is now: Supreme and iconic. I'll drink to that ! SO yes readers, that's about it. Mental note to self, as cliché as these may sounds: keep you friends close, but keep your enemies closer.

Madonna: Love Spent

You had all of me You wanted more Would you have married me If I were poor? I guess if I was your treasury You'd have found the time to treasure me How come you can't see All that you need Was right here with me Until the end All this pretend wasn't for free Hold me like your money Tell me that you want me Spend your love on me Spend your love on me Now you have your money Spend it til there's nothing Spend your love on me Spend your love on me If we opened up a joint account Would it put an end to all your doubt? Frankly, if my name was Benjamin We wouldn't be in the mess we're in You played with my heart Til death do we part That's what you said Now you have your fast car, Women and bars,its gone to your head Hold me like your money Tell me that you want me Spend your love on me Spend your love on me Love me like your money Spend it til there's nothing Spend your love on me Spend your love on me Spend your love on me I want you to take me Like you took your money Take me in your arms Until your last breath I want you to hold me Like you hold your money Hold on to me Til there's nothing left Love spent,really love spent Yeah I'm love spent Wondering where the love went Love spent, yeah I'm love spent Really love spent Wondering where it all went I want you to take me Like you took your money Take me in your arms Until your last breath I want you to hold me Like you hold your money Hold me in your arms Until there's nothing left Nothing left Nothing left Nothing left Love spent Really love spent Yeah, I'm love spent Wondering where the love went Love spent Yeah I'm love spent Really love spent Wondering where it all went I want you to take me like you took your money Take me In your arms until your last breath I want you to hold me like you hold your money Hold me in your arms until there's nothing left Nothing left Nothing left Nothing left Nothing left

Thandie Newton: Not just a pretty exotic actress

I've been watching TED (IDEAS WORTH SPREADING ) www.ted.com ,quite often lately. A collections of public speaking talks : ranging from technology, entertainment, social skills to the global skills. Anything that is worth sharing and spread to mankind. Face it we need these every now and then. I stumbled upon Thandie Newton. A british born actress with a Welsh and Zimbabwe mix. I am so in love with this talk and watching it over and over again. Loving how smart, eloquent and compassionate her true personality . The beauty inside of her that seems to be more outstanding than her outside beauty. Excerpt from TED: Actor Thandie Newton tells the story of finding her "otherness" -- first, as a child growing up in two distinct cultures, and then as an actor playing with many different selves. A warm, wise talk, fresh from stage at TEDGlobal 2011. Swinging from Hollywood blockbusters to sensitive indie films, Thandie Newton brings thoughtfulness and delicate beauty to her work Enjoy

Updating

Hi fellow readers , new and old :) You'll realize I'm constantly updating my blog the last couple of hours. These are actually archive from my previous drafts that were never been published. So I decided to finally publishing them:) enjoy the read.

Me in youtube!

This what happens when you tend to hang out with some crazy bunch of friends, it's fabulousity to the max!
p/s I do missed my long hair...

The Power of Communication

Communication can be universal and subjective, from simple exchange of a glance , to verbal language corresponding, to written words (blogging for example) to body language(a subtle and gentle touch can translate so many things) I believe much in communicating well. All my life, I work and learn hard to communicate properly and improve myself in this area as much as I could. As I'm working, it becomes my profession and my passion. Lately I'm doing my best to communicate well and use it as my side profession. I'm in the midst of exposing myself in a world of emceeing, I can do all sorts of event(parties, concerts, events, launching and functions) my trilingual skills(ENGLISH, MALAY and MANDARIN) always come in handy, my self and individual style of emcee will make me different anyone else. Trust me when I say these: I'm not perfect, but I'm willing to learn and be criticize to improve myself, I welcome any critics and comments. I will not fall to a cliche and stereotype emcees , I will make it myself unique. Care to try me? contact me here (neynaprada@gmail.com)

Anyway, as I was saying, communication must somehow follows
some guidelines, although there is no fine line on communicating in this world, everyone must learn to adapt both the culture and personalities of the receiving end. Execution of communication must be based on understanding with hopes of smoother mutual agreements for both parties.
I'm speaking on my 30 years experience in this area(which is back to my actual subject:communication), some people choose different type of communicating and expressing. A dear friend of mine use lyrics of songs to express his anger and happiness, some use emails to confront an issues(as some may feels that face to face communicating can or may lead to a distraction) some like myself, prefer to do it face to face, looking at reaction and emotions of the person you talk to can help to improve the end product of anything. Call me old fashion, in anything (be it relationships and relationships) I prefer to talk personally, rather than using old the latest technologies(i.e whatsapping,wechating ,blackberry messaging, emails, Facebook status updating, mobile texting and now 'twittering') I even find talking on the phone doesn't fit my personal criteria of being personal(mind my pun) I prefer meeting the person, talk to them in person and experience it eye to eye/body to body(in some cases). That's my style of communicating.
My ways of communication has gradually change the past few years, I used to be an observer, I used to be the clown that makes every laugh with my vulgar, dirty jokes. I grew out of that phase(not extremely much, I still sustained the sex-citing side of me)
These days, being bitchy and blunt can be a bit outdated, when the real foundation in anything is basically being honest and expressive in communicating. We all love someone who is sincere and generous with words(ala Paula Abdul) but there must a strike balance of bluntness (Simon would be too much to digest)
I'm glad that most issues that I faces , I've resolved them with what I regards as a good communication skills that I've possessed . I always believe, the only problems in you would be when you are not ready to express and being honest with yourself. You practically knows the answer to any questions, is the matter on how you find them and use it to resolve an issues. Everything you do is a choice, and the choice to use the communication skills as your weapon or shield is basically up to yourself.
Now tell me what do you think if we don't have this in us? Remember, even animals communicate, every single God's creature are given this gifts. Communication is no longer a skill, is what you have. Is not a natural born talent in you, is something you will eventually learn along the way. The choices are yours....


xoxo

Alhamdulilah- I Just feel blessed..

it's 7.10am, KLIA McDonald's awaiting for breaking fast. I'm heading back to Kuching tonight, was here in KL for a short trip/ meeting and training at Plaza Sentral. I took the chance to meet up a few important people. I've been observing a few things around me lately. is like telling me something, been stumbling the same group of people over and over again, for the last 48 hours. Almost everywhere I go, I see elderly women(between 50 to 60 years old age- which is close to my mom's age) working as a cleaner or just odd workers . I see this peaceful face, working tirelessly- for me, they should not be working like these anymore, they should be spending more time at home. But life these days are more demanding and challenging as they used to be. I'm sure they must have their own reasons to do so. But still, I feel uneasy and a bit pitiful for them.

Shouldn't their children be taking caring of their mom, shouldn't their children be responsible to the person who sacrificed their life for them. Why they are neglected in that way? Don't they have the slight humane emotions in them to even let their mother works at such old age.

but who am I to judge? I'm not absolutely perfect myself. Maybe I did neglect my own mother before, maybe I was rude and being hurtful to them. Maybe I used to be rebellious to her. God knows how many time I made my mom cries. And I remembered what someone used to say to me, a single drop of tear from a mother- is like a diamond crashing on the floor. That's how sacred a mom's tear.
As I'm getting older, I can't help but be more emphatic on the things around me, and people around me. I try to be more compassionate and be more tolerant to my surroundings. I am not living in the world all by myself after all. I have to, hell I need to co-exist with everything and everyone. Mom has been such an inspirations to me and as cliche as anyone else would say, their love is so much different than a father's love. They gave you life, they share you their life- for 9 months, you share with her everything. That is something you should look into.

Helo there :)

Hey fellow readers of my humble blogs(exactly 11 of you here) 1st I like to apologize on my long hiatus on writing here. It's been almost 14 months since I last updated my blog. That was a very long long break. What's happening since you may asked. Loads of exciting things. Ranging from heartbreaking, memory worthy and life changing experience I had . I'm not going to bore anyone of you with my past, it's a part of my history(some I would like to completely mentally removed from myself. So, this is another introduction, well a re-introduction literally of my blog. I've seen some awesome changes to blogger and the fact that I can update it from almost anywhere and anytime. ( I am equipped with a macbook pro(yupp upgraded me-self finally), an Iphone 4S and an Ipad) no excuses of being a slacker no more. From today 16th November 2012, I'll update and share of my thoughts to the universe. Get ready for some serious life drama(much better than the soapy indonesian sinetron or pinoy soaps) at least my drama have more substance ..heh?! Ciao Bella X